At least I’m Sweat’n free

It’s a craze we do up here while we’re drink’n beer and sweat’n
dream’n bout the air being dry, when the heat’s not so upset’n
cause when I wake up in the morn, I’m slimy wet from head to foot
and when I’m sit’n on the throne, I keep a’slide’n off the toot
Yes, I can be sweat’n when I’m write’n and even when I’m think’n
But with all this sweating go’in on, can’t smell nobody stink’n

Yep, we’re sweat’n while we’re think’n, while we’re write’n and a’pray’n
and I’m sure that God is listen’n and gets the picture I’m portray’n
I sweat when the sun comes up and worse when it is sett’n
I sweat while I remember thing, and sweat when I’m forget’n

My dog ain’t lookin good, sweat is pour’n off his tongue
my pond fish have all died and my budgie’s not too young
my wife is breath’n heavy and it ain’t because of me
we’re both sweat’n far too much to ever disagree
There’s no point in going shop’n, the fruit and veggies all gone rotten
It’s get’n worser and upset’n, we’re fallen deeper in debt’n
and our kids, well God bless’m, can’t learn when they are fret’n
they say their brains are get’n foggy and their books have all gone soggy
the gambler’s don’t like bet’n, on the Russian game roulette’n

Some of me neighbors on the hill, packed their bags, they gonna flee
snooty little buggers, we always seemed to disagree
they’re all on yachts, gone somewhere sail’n, with the other bourgeoisie
don’t mind being left behind out here, at least I’m sweat’n free

But I reckon there’s a few of youse, just think I’m bullshit’n
So I’ll make a little wager, if you don’t mind a little bet’n
That you can’t write a better verse, without fret’n and a’sweat’n

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